I’ve been living my sexual life quietly in the period I’ve been absent from the blog – if memory (depressingly) serves me correctly, I haven’t had sex this year.
The Drummer’s libido has been increasing and he’s discussed that he’s here and available when I’m ready again. While we aren’t physical with each other at the moment, we’re close in other ways and I’m confident we’ll sort out an accommodating medium in our sex drives and interests at some stage. It’s hard to admit defeat at times that we just aren’t a match sexually, much as we try until he’s anxious about me not enjoying myself, and I feel guilty that I reach the point of discomfort and sometimes pain before stopping things if his orgasm is elusive. The oddity of our situation is that we’re struggling to find others to misbehave with when we could be having sex with each other, however, the lure of new experiences and desire to experiment with others can never be underestimated. And he’s just not into being cuffed and spanked and those little urges pop into my mind on a regular basis :-).
I met someone and here is my confession that I have turned away an attractive, bisexual man in an open relationship. Maybe I should be spanking some sanity into myself. He lives near the city and beyond my geographical boundaries but we got on well and met within a week of first making contact. He is the stereotypical tall, skinny, spectacle-wearing computer programmer type who doesn’t go for whatever demographic I fit in (rapidly-ageing, slightly alternative crazy cat lady) but we liked each other and spent an afternoon having lunch and wandering the local beach. We both had attacks of shyness at the end but kissed goodbye a few times before parting and promising to catch up in the near future.
Fast-forward six weeks and we still haven’t caught up. He had plans, he got sick, I got my period, he — I don’t know as I can’t remember, I think he left my last invitation unanswered for a couple of days so I made other plans. I ended up saying it was easier to give up before we start and he sounded disappointed but accepting. I’m not one for back-tracking and I’m also not one for being able to keep irregular liaisons going so I’m going to reluctantly leave him be.
I met someone else the other night who was a leftover from my last campaign. I sent him away for crimes against grammar* and for telling tales that he’s had fewer than a handful of sexual partners (he’s in his early thirties and I was in the jaded final days of being online so everything I read seemed to be gold-coated bullshit).
He kept returning, like a cute puppy that keeps jumping up your leg for attention when you’re telling it go away but really smiling on the inside. While his written expression hasn’t improved, I ended up agreeing to meet him as I picked up a few hints of guilelessness and honesty that piqued my curiosity. He’s lovely, he’s more articulate in person than anticipated, he’s as honest and unsullied as he said and, oh, he’s just re-uniting with his girlfriend but doesn’t think it will work out so he is in a fragile emotional state and not sure what he wants.
I don’t think he’s acting out of malice in meeting women (his on-again girlfriend didn’t receive the marriage proposal she set a deadline on, and publicly and promptly took up with his mate for six months) but I don’t think he’s going to be stable enough to corrupt, as much as I’d like to. He’s never had sex in a car and I doubt he’s ever had a tongue in his arse – is there anyone more qualified than me to give him some new experiences? I think not. And what if he’s never been spanked? However, if I can get myself back on topic, I believe he should sort out his personal situation before seeking new adventures and not the other way around.
We parted amiably and he has since thanked me for the chat. Appreciation isn’t an orgasm but it felt good in its own way.
* I rest my case: