Here are some subtle signs that a man on a first meeting isn’t into you:
- He doesn’t touch or get close enough to be touched on greeting – not even for a handshake
- He walks to the venue three body-widths to the side and half a width behind
- He returns to talking about work when the conversation has been changed to more personal topics
- His eyes wander to the group of office workers over there and that piece of rubbish being blown by the wind over there
- He says he wants to drop by the office when five minutes earlier he said he avoids dropping by the office like the plague
- He checks his phone even though it doesn’t ring or vibrate
- He turns crushing his empty drink can into an artform
- He says, “It was nice to meet you,” at the end
And you know what? After picking up on about the third clue and realising he wasn’t interested to the point of being repelled by me, I felt light of heart and feet and almost cartwheeled back to my car. I somewhat wish I knew why he didn’t find me the most stunning and alluring woman in the universe — just out of curiosity — but I’m not making contact again to find out.
But harking back to the truth in advertising comment in my last post, he was three inches shorter than the height he wrote in his profile, his pictures were taken at least five years ago and his gut had expanded substantially (he chose to create a user name that included an athlete-type word word in it). Physical features aren’t issues in themselves as attraction comes from the most unusual sources sometimes (an actor’s large and knobbly hands stole my attention the last time I watched gay porn), but obvious denial and bullshitting wastes everyone’s time. If I hadn’t arrived early and told him where I was so he could find me, I would have struggled to recognise him.
I never thought I’d be so pleased about being rejected.