Over the past couple of weeks I’ve been involved in more admin than action with ArmyDude. After he cancelled the meeting with the possible third person, we had also planned tentatively to meet a couple the following week and I was to contact another woman he’d been in touch with to prove I did indeed exist. After a couple of dozen indecisive messages the night of the first cancellation he asked me to postpone the couple and the woman for a week, yet we still didn’t have any kind of plan for getting him out of the house safely in future.

I hit my limit of crap, cancelled them all and ignored him for a couple of days. The project was becoming bigger than the underpinning reason for being together.

I said no to his next invitations to meet and reluctantly yes to a third when I’d worked out what I wanted to talk about — it was hard to convert “I dread hearing my phone buzz at the moment because I know it’ll be you” into language and intent that wasn’t so heartless.

I dropped by his house and we sorted a few things out on the chair of his study when his head was between my legs and his fingers were working my cunt and anus. I made sure to do most of the talking to avoid interrupting his work.

We agreed on more while I was on all fours on his bed and he was fucking me from behind and pulling my hair.

I disagreed with his proposal to stick his cock in my arse without lubricant — his response was to flip me on my back with my legs in the air and fuck me while standing at the side of the bed with my feet curled around his neck. I keep forgetting about this undervalued position until I’m in it and remember the pleasures of being able to feel so damn good while watching the show in front of me.

He later suggested we suspend the shared online account for a while and get back to basics. I could only nod assent because his cock was in my mouth and about to erupt down my throat.

All in all it was a successful meeting, however, I zoned out a couple of times during sex and don’t know why. I over-compensated by participating with more energy so he wouldn’t notice my mind wandering. I hope it’s just post-crapfest comedown.